Heavy, the slowest class
by Lykanthropa
Summary: Heavy is slow. Very slowly. This is particularly apparent on the new map. But in the end it turns out that sometimes it can be an advantage to be slow.


**He who laughs last, laughs loudest**

Mountain Lab:

The RED team is at the ready. Rocket launchers, Medigun and Minigun at the ready too, the mercenaries are waiting to get the green light from the administrator to take control points one at a time and then wipe out the entire BLU team.

 _"Mission begins in ten seconds!"_ the voice echoes from the speakers.  
Mountain Lab is called this place. It is only the second time that they are fighting here. A battleground in the middle of a big, dark forest. And accordingly, it looks like this. Dark. Even during the day. Above this forest hovers a darkness that is present even during the day. The only thing that enlightens this place are the lanterns that are scattered around here.  
 _"Five!"_  
The first time they won.  
 _"Four!"_  
They will win again.  
 _"Three!"_  
Because this "map", as the battlegrounds are called, allows the Mercs to apply a unique tactic.  
 _"Two!"_  
The Blitzkrieg.  
 _"One!"_

The gate opens and the Mercs do not hesitate for a second. They storm out and it starts.  
Demoman spreads some of his sticky bombs on the ground and catapults himself high in the air. So high that he could overcome every building and every mountain.  
Soldier copies him with his rocket jump. He takes Medic under his arm and with a Bang! these two are gone, too.  
Far in the background the fight sounds are clearly audible. So far up in the air, they are out of reach of the enemy Sentry and can easily destroy them with bombs and missiles from above. And the defending team as well. And Scout takes advantage of it to quickly conquer the control points. That's why he is starting now. As fast as the wind, he disappeared around the corner to do his part. Until the BLU team respawns, they will have already conquered all control points. Just like last time.

Pyro starts up his Thermal Thruster and follows the others through the air.  
Engineer uses his Sentry whisperer to let throw himself from his Sentry into the air.  
Sniper simply uses his van to follow the team. The road to the control points is wide enough to get through with his vehicle.  
And Spy? Spy just makes himself invisible and is gone, too.  
A clever and efficient tactic that, however, has a catch for one of them.  
Heavy stays back, all alone.  
He cannot fly, nor is he fast on foot. On the contrary. He is the slowest in the whole team. The last time, when he has finally caught up with the others, they have already won.  
He feels so useless…  
And to make him feel even worse, Scout makes fun of him.  
The administrator evaluates their actions in combat and displays the points of each of them on a board.  
The last time Heavy had zero points. And this time it will probably not be different.

 _"Captured the control point A!"_  
Now fast! Even though Heavy knows he will not fight this time again, he still tries to keep up and runs.  
The weight of the minigun additionally throttles its speed. But Heavy is hanging on.  
He follows the path to the first control point. When he passes by, the administrator announces that they have now also captured control point B.  
Only one is missing and the Russian has not even made half of the route. Even Engineer with his toolbox is faster than him. Neither at checkpoint A nor at checkpoint B you can see the red Sentry. How does he manage to get his sentries up and down so fast? Maybe he is a magician? Heavy will ask him.

 _"We have captured the last control point! The slaughter festival can begin!"_ the bodyless voice of the administrator dins through the place. She sounds very satisfied and almost a bit eager. For this woman, it must be a real satisfaction when the winning team chases and destroys the loser team down to the last. Of course, it must be mentioned that she is neither on the side of the RED, nor on the BLUs. Should the BLU team win, she would also proudly announce their victory and wish them much fun in slaughtering the RED team.  
This woman gives Heavy the creeps…

Heavy had almost reached the lab where the last control point is located. From inside you can hear the laughter of his teammates. Shots and exploding bombs and missiles.  
Heavy had never been involved in such a thing. If a team loses, they are prohibited from continuing to fight. They have to lay down their weapons. Also with the knowledge to be killed.  
Heavy does not think it's right to kill unarmed people. That's just not right. While the others enjoy it, the Russian feels compassion for his enemies.  
In order not to have to look at this, he turns to return to the base.

In the evening, the members of the RED teams sit together and celebrate their success with a feast. The Mercs share each other their fighting skills of today for the best.  
"Did you see how I finished off the BLU Heavy?" Scout boasts. "Jumped around him all the time while the slowpoke tried to target me with his minigun. And then - plumps - he fell over."  
"And then I shredded him into a thousand pieces with a nice crit bomb! Harhar!"  
"Pfft! You stole my kill, cyclops."  
"Well, boy. First come, first served. Didn't your mother teach ya not to play with your victim?"  
"I was just having fun. Just because you kill does not necessarily mean that you have to be deadly serious at work."  
"I am not. But when I see a BLU, I kill him without hesitation. No matter if he's sitting on the toilet, sleeping or doing high five with another BLU. Because that's what I enjoy a lot. Will ya give me the sushi?"  
"Yes, of course."  
Scout picks up one of the Maki, takes a big swing and throws it like a pitcher in baseball in Demoman's direction. But this one stays cool and skillfully catches it with one hand.  
"Thanks mate."  
"Pah…"

"Medic, I have to say, you were in top shape again today. For your age, I mean."  
Soldier puts an arm around Medic's shoulder next to him.  
"Thank you, Soldier. I do my best. But do me a favor and warn me before you blow yourself up with me."  
"Rocket jumps are a must! Without them a... a... thingamajig would not be possible!"  
"You mean Blitzkrieg? That's a simple word."  
"German words just don't pass my lips easily."  
"That surprises me. Because Fritz, Kraut, Kaiser and Oktoberfest you can pronounce excellent."  
"That's just coincidence."  
"Of course."  
Medic rolls his eyes. His gaze get caught on Heavy.  
"Heavy, I missed you today."  
"Yeah, fatty! Where have you been again? You had no points again."  
"Heavy is not fast enough to keep up with Blitzkrieg."  
"Aww! Why not? Are you too old or too fat? Hmm... I guess you're too fat."

Engineer clears his throat to attract attention.  
"This is the second time that Heavy has been unable to participate in combat. We should think about how we can change that."  
"Why? That's not necessary. We have proven twice that we can manage without him."  
"Shut up, Scout!" Spy warns. "Engineer is right. Heavy is part of this team. And we must not leave anyone behind."  
"The next fight against BLU in the Mountain Lab is the day after tomorrow. So we only have one day to get Heavy fit."  
"What do you say, Heavy?"  
"Heavy does not want to be left behind. Please help me."  
"Now you're talking! We will not let you down, lad!"  
"Yes, we will make you get a move on, commie. With my training you will soon be as fast as a rocket!"  
"I too will come up with something. Don't worry, Heavy."  
"Thank you, Doktor."  
Heavy is touched. He really has a great team. But at the same time he is worried. How do they want to do that? And this training from Soldier...

Heavy is rudely awakened from sleep the next morning.  
He sleepily lifts his head and discovers Soldier standing in front of his bed, his trumpet in one hand.  
"Get out of bed, maggot! It's already late!"  
Heavy glances at the clock. It's 6 o'clock in the morning.  
He opens his mouth to protest but Soldier interrupts him.  
"Don't give me that Let me sleep for another 5 minutes bullshit! Do you want to keep up with us or not?"  
"All right. Heavy understood."  
"Then stand up and come along!"  
"I have to get dressed first."  
"And even if you were naked! There is no time!"  
Now Heavy changes to bear mode. He gets out of bed and looks down at Soldier with a warning look. "Heavy. Will. Not. Train. In. Pyjama" he growls.  
The American selects reverse gear. At the door of the room he barks for the last time: "Don't stay too long in front of the mirror! You are not going on the catwalk, after all!" And then he disappeared.  
"Hmpf!"

A little later Heavy stands in his full Mercenary overall with Soldier on the training ground behind their base. He presses his rocket launcher into his hands.  
"You know how to use such a weapon?"  
"No…"  
"Lift the launcher on your shoulder, aim at the target and then fire! So not unlike like other weapons."  
Heavy follows Soldier's instruction, but faces an obstacle.  
"What's up? Shoot!"  
"I do not know how."  
"Are you blind? At the far handle is a trigger."  
Heavy's finger gropes for it and he finds it. But...  
"What is it now?"  
"My finger does not fit through the ring."  
"Are you serious, son? Wait. **MEDIC! MMEEEEEEEDDDIIIIIIIIICCC!** "  
The doctor appears at one of the windows and looks slightly acidified.  
"What?"  
"Bring me a tube of oil right away!"  
"What!?"  
"Just do it, sister!"  
"Ja, ja…"  
Medic left.  
"And hurry up!"  
"Why're ya screaming like that?" Demoman shouts angrily from another window. "There are people here who still want to sleep!"  
"Really, Hardhelm! What are you thinking?" Now Scout is awake too.  
"Sleep time is over! Up with your tired bones and mustered! And also tell that the other lame-o! **AND I SCREAM AS MUCH AS I WANT, MAGGOTS!** "  
There are no arguments.  
Heavy feels uncomfortable. He really wants help and support, but when Soldier deals with the others like that, the Russian fears that they might be mad at him. Because if he were not so slow, all this would not be necessary here at all. And it does not matter that Soldier always talks to them like that.

Medic is the first to join them. He brought his Medigun and hands Soldier the tube of oil.  
"Here."  
The American takes it from him, grabs Heavy's hand and pours half the bottle on his forefinger. The feeling of this greasy liquid on the skin makes Heavy feel unwell.  
"Go now! Finger through the hole!"  
When he tried again, it does not succeed the first time, but eventually the oil does its work and Heavy can finally put his finger on the trigger. However, he cannot bend it properly because his finger is just too big.  
"So! Now point the rocket launcher to the ground-"  
"Wait!"  
"Stay out of this, sister! You have no idea about heavy weapons! So don't disturb us during training!"  
"Maybe I don't understand much about heavy weapons, yes. But I understand a lot about injuries."  
"And?"  
Now Demoman, Engineer and the rest come to the training ground.  
"Hey, hey, hey! That looks interesting" scoffs Scout, as he sees the Russian with the rocket launcher.  
"Why don't you give him the practice rocket launcher? He would take less damage."  
"You're right. Maybe I should also use the practice rocket launcher in the fight against the BLUs."  
Medic rolls his eyes annoyed.  
"Maggot! The commie must learn to practice jumping with a real rocket launcher! Because tomorrow it depends!"  
"Okay, good. But then help me to provide my Übercharge."  
"We don't have time for that!"  
"Okay, good. Then tomorrow I will go with Heavy. He certainly appreciates my Übercharge."  
Heavy looks uncertainly between Soldier and Medic back and forth.  
"Haha! That's better than a sitcom!"  
"Fine" Soldier growls, taking Heavy the rocket launcher away (initially with difficulty because his big finger got stuck in the ring). "Then aim for it, Doc. All out of the way!"  
The rest of the team takes a big step backwards. Medic activates the Medigun and Soldier starts small rocket jumps to allow Medic to recharge his Medigun.  
"Okay, I'm charged now."  
Finally! And you, Commie? Did you pay attention and see how I did that?"  
"Da…"  
"Then here you go."  
Soldier hands Heavy his rocket launcher and disgusted wipes down the oil on his pants.  
Heavy looks worried.  
"Don't worry. I take care that you don't hurt yourself" promises Medic him and that gives him courage.  
He loads the heavy weapon on his shoulder, fights his finger again through the hole on the trigger and directs the barrel to the ground.  
"Okay, I'll start the Übercharge. You have 8 seconds. Ready?"  
"Da, Doktor."  
"Let's go."  
Ludwig starts the Übercharge. He and Heavy are dipped in the familiar red light and the Russian does not hesitate to pull the trigger.  
The rocket shoots from the muzzle. The explosion carries Heavy only a few inches above the ground. This brings him completely out of balance and he crashes to the ground.  
"Jump! You have to jump, maggot! It doesn't mean rocket jump for nothing!"  
Heavy feels pressured.  
"There are still 50%, Heavy. You can do it!"  
Misha is really pleased that Medic has such confidence in him, but he can jump as well as he can run.  
But he gets up and tries again. As strong as possible, the Russian pushes off the ground and simultaneously shoots the second rocket. And in fact he comes up to two meters high.  
"Yes! Very good, Heavy!"  
But he loses his balance again. He makes a half turn and with his belly forward he falls to the ground. In panic Heavy activates the trigger and a rocket shoots from the muzzle, which is aimed directly at Scout and the others.  
"Watch out!"  
Everyone manages to get out of the way, except for…  
"SPY!"  
"What?"  
BOOM!  
Blood, guts and intestines are spread on the training ground.  
Heavy strikes the ground, landing on the rocket launcher that breaks through in the middle.  
"Eww…"  
"Haha! I bet Spy had a different picture of his morning" Scout laughs.  
"You will mop up this mess here!"  
"What?! Why me? I didn't shred the guy into a thousand pieces!"  
"This was an order!"  
"I don't touch that! Geez! What's your problem?"  
Soldier is angry because Heavy has destroyed his rocket launcher, "Medic soothes. His Übercharge has just lasted until Heavy is back on the ground with both legs.  
"Pah! In the storage room there are still enough rocket launcher of this kind."  
"Yes. But only this one had a rare skin."  
"Shut up, Fritz! I'll go get a new one, then we'll try something else!"  
Soldier trudges away.  
"I will not clear away this filth here for sure. That's what Spy can do. After all, this are his body parts."  
"Stop grousing and do what ya're told."  
"Want to mess with me, Cyclops?"  
"I'll spank you so hard that your bottom looks like a baboon ass!"  
Medic starts to listen attentively. "Baboon?"  
But the two squabblers ignore him.  
"And why are you so pissed off? Didn't had your alcohol today, eh? Take a long sip and come off."  
"How dare ya to talk to me like that?"  
"The way you usually talk to a drunkard."  
"Come here!"  
Demoman starts hunting Scout. The guy is much faster than the bomb specialist. Actually, he has absolutely no chance to catch him. But Scout slips on the blood and falls to the ground. Demoman doesn't waste any time, grabs the boy, pulls down his pants and underpants and gives him a hard punch on the buttocks. The sound of his flat hand striking the virgin white bottom echoed throughout the place, followed by Scout's cry of pain.

Medic shakes his head in disappointment and turns his attention to Heavy. He stands there and looks guiltily down on the broken rocket launcher.  
"Are you okay, Heavy?"  
"Yes ... I'm sorry about the rocket launcher."  
"Don't worry about that."  
"But what if the rocket launcher for Soldier was what Sasha is for me? It would break Heavy's Heart if something happened to Sasha."  
"I don't think that's how it is. His launcher didn't even have a name - unlike his shovel... He's just so upset because this rocket launcher had a rare skin. He will calm down again."  
"I'm back!" Soldier returns with a new rocket launcher. "It has not been cleaned here yet!"  
"Shut up!" Scout screams at him as he rubs his aching butt.  
"Pfah! And what about you, sister? Is the Übercharge ready?"  
"No?"  
"Do I have to do everything by myself?"  
"Don't worry. It's done in a minute. Unless you help me again."  
"No time for that! Just aim."  
"What are you planning, Soldier?"  
But the American ignores Medic and turns to Heavy. He kicks the remains of his old rocket launcher aside.  
"Get on my shoulder, commie!"  
"H-heavy does not think that is a good idea."  
"Shut up and climb!" Jane kneels down.  
Heavy looks confused over to Medic. He shrugs and nods.  
The seasoned Russian tries to ascend from behind. Soldier grits his teeth. Heavy is heavy. No question. But Soldier actually manages to get up with Heavy on his shoulders. Medic keeps up with aim with the Medigun without a break.  
Solly's legs are shaking heavily under the weight they have to carry.  
"Okay, commie. I'm going to blow ourselves up now. Don't wobble, understood?"  
"D-da…"  
Heavy does not feel good about it. Just as Medic and the others.  
Soldier aims with the rocket launcher to the ground and fires. However, Heavy is so heavy that he cannot jump even an inch.  
The result: everything below his hips gets blast away.  
At the same moment Spy steps out of the base, freshly spawned and slightly acidified. But he hardly stands outside, he is hit by flying body parts and carried off his feet.

Soldier lies with his back on the ground, out of his throat escapes a mark-piercing cry of pain.  
Heavy has remained as good as unhurt. He was blown up a bit by the blast and now lands on Soldier's face with all his weight. His scream is stifled, and only a moment later nothing is heard from Soldier.  
Heavy hastily rolls off his face. Scout and the others turn away in disgust. Soldier's face is flattened. His nose is bent sideways and blood flows out of it and the mouth. His eyes are staring blankly into the air. But he is still alive.  
Medic strengthened the beam of his Medigun and in just a few seconds Soldier is restored, plus two new legs, while Spy is buried beneath the old ones.  
Medic helps him up. He does not speak but gropes around in his face and then his head. His helmet is no longer there. Heavy discovers it on the ground, picks it up and hands it to Soldier.  
He tears it from his hand and puts it back on.  
"Soldier?"  
Finally, Jane clears his throat.  
"Heavy…"  
"Yes, Soldier?"  
"You are even heavier than a fat, adult blue whale ashore! Not even Hercules could lift you up and make a rocket jump at the same time!"  
Embarrassed, Heavy looks down on the floor.  
"Now it's Demoman's turn to practice sticky bomb jumping with you!"  
"NAH!"

Spy now joins the group after freeing himself from Soldier's legs. His suit is smeared with blood but he still tries to keep his composure.  
"You doing it all wrong. Heavy will never manage it till tomorrow. For that you need years of training. Especially someone like Heavy."  
"And what do you suggest, Frenchie?"  
"No idea. Maybe he should run a few laps. Scout, you wanted to do it, right?"  
"Yeah! I'll hunt that meatball for a few laps around the place. I'll make him fit!"  
"And if that doesn't work, we still 'ave Medic. Docteur, you 'ave something in store for 'im, right?"  
"Yes."  
"Well, then we should leave that to the two from now on. No more explosions, understood?"  
"What about you, Spy?"  
"What?"  
"What do you do to help Heavy?"  
"I don't know how."  
"You could give him your watch."  
"To become invisible does not mean to gain speed. These are two different things, Sniper. But we could easily do it all by letting him ride in your van."  
"No way! My tires would bursting! Oh uh... no offense, Heavy."  
"It is okay."  
"And how about Pyro moving him with the airblast of his flame thrower? Pyro, come here!"  
Pyro does what Soldier tells him to do.  
"Good thing he always has his flamethrower with him" says Engineer.  
"I think that's scary..." Scout replies.

Soldier positions Pyro in front of Heavy.  
"And now blow him off!"  
The Russian begins to tremble all over. He does not quite trust Pyro. Instead of using the airblast, he could turn him into a living torch. But Pyro stands still and looks at Soldier with his head to one side.  
"Pretend as if you would extinguish him!" Soldier's orders but Pyro's only reaction is to shift his head to the other side.  
"Ggrrr! Wait a moment! Maybe we have to light the commie, so the maggot knows what he has to do."  
Heavy startles. Enraged, he grabs Soldier by the neck and pulls him up to him, while he bares his teeth.  
"Never mind, lad. I hardly believe that the airblast is strong enough to move Heavy. And even if. If Pyro encounters the BLUs, he will be out of ammo to fight."  
"Okay, okay! Roger that! Now let me down!"  
Heavy lets go of Soldier and he grabs his aching neck. "Then Scout and Medic should take care of you, but I don't think that's going to happen."  
"Yeah!"  
"And the other sad rest wipes away the blood here!"  
"Cannot we just leave that to the rain?" Demoman asks with a disgusted look on the innards at his feet.  
"Has anyone volunteered for the one-man cleaning army right now?"  
Demoman, Spy, Sniper and Engineer exchange views - and walk away.  
"Hey, where are you going? Come back immediately! I'm not taking care of this mess alone by myself!" Soldier follows the others upset and almost stumbles around his abandoned legs. Even in the base his screaming can still be heard.  
Heavy, Medic and Scout follow them with the eyes. Then their attention turns to Pyro, who is still standing in front of Heavy with his flamethrower and somehow looks lost.  
Scout claps his hands to get his attention.  
"Skedaddle! Shoo!"  
Pyro doesn't stir for a second but then he wobbles to the others into the base.  
"Funny guy…"  
Heavy breaths deeply in and out. He is just glad that the mouth of the flame-thrower is no longer aimed at him.  
"Want to try it first, Scout?"  
"For sure! If that does not work, you're our ace in the sleeve, Doc."  
"If you say so."  
"Well then come on the racetrack, fatty. I will make you fit!"

"C'mon, c'mon, c'mon!"  
Stertorously, Heavy runs after Scout. He runs in front of him, backwards and propels him, although they have already run a thousand rounds - it seems to Heavy anyway. He is completely at the end.  
"Heavy... Heavy can't go on any longer...!"  
"Are you kiddin' me? That's just the fifth round! Don't you feel the runner's high?"  
"I feel *gasp* an emerging *gasp* heart attack!"  
"Don't make such a fuss and run a little faster instead!"  
Heavy grabs his left chest and continues to lose speed until he finally comes to a stop and bends over gasping.  
"Scout is worked up. "Geez! Doc, can you come? The pork jowl has a heart attack."  
Medic, who had been watching the two from the edge, approaches them.  
"With the heart of a baboon a myocardial infarction is almost impossible."  
"Yeah, whatever. I'm not in the mood anymore. This slowpoke is not trainable. Good luck with him."  
And with these words he leaves the two alone.

"Are you okay, Heavy?"  
"Scout is right."  
"Maybe you are not the fastest, but everyone has their strengths and weaknesses. And Scout is no exception. He is fast and agile, but you are tall and strong and can thus break through the enemy lines like a tank."  
"A tank is also slow. And in this blitzkrieg my strength has no use."  
"Yes, that is problematic. I have something prepared. If you want, I'll give you a syringe with special content. It must not be. All we have to do is win once more on this map and we're off to the next one. Maybe we would need your skills there more."  
Heavy's thinking. They only have to win once and then no longer fight on this map. So it probably would not make any difference if he could keep up with his team or not. But because it's the last fight, he wants to be present!  
He has decided.  
"Heavy wants to keep up with the team."  
"OK. Then please follow me to the infirmary. There I give you the remedy and then we see what happens."  
Heavy falters. "How does Doktor mean that?"  
"Oh, um ... I have not tested it yet. I was on it all night yesterday. Of course, I had no opportunity to test it on a living being. But that's not a problem for you, is it? You were the first one whose heart I changed. Everything went well."  
"Doktor is right."  
Medic and Heavy make their way to the infirmary. When they enter, Heavy is amazed at the mess that reigns there.  
"Please take a seat. I'll get the serum."  
Heavy does what Medic tells him, sits down and looks around. When Medic steps in, he notices his eyes.  
"I'm sorry it looks here like this."  
"Is it because of that?" Heavy asks, looking at the syringe in Medic's hand.  
"Indeed."  
"The color is purple…"  
"Do not worry. The color has nothing to do with the content. I've been slipping around until the liquid turns purple. I like the color. And now please give me your arm, so I can inject it into your veins."  
"What is it's name?"  
"What? Oh, I don't have a name yet. I don't even know if it works at all."  
Heavy lets Medic inject the liquid. He bites his teeth tightly as it begins to radiate in his whole arm.  
"And what does that do to Heavy?"  
"Well, it should make you faster. If everything works out. It ensures that your energy is used efficiently when you start to run. All power is applied to your legs. You could reach top speeds and maybe even run faster than Scout."  
Heavy's heart is filled with excitement. He would like to test it immediately.  
"You should still wait. The serum must first spread in your body and attach itself. By tomorrow morning at the latest, you should be ready for action. Don't worry and have a nice day. How about chess?"  
"Da!"  
"But first I have to clean up a bit here. Prepare everything."

The next day the Mercs are back in the starting blocks. Heavy is nervous. So far, he has felt no change since he was injected with the purple stuff. His Sasha, however, feels much easier today than usual today.  
Medic notices his uncertain expression and pats his shoulder in a friendly tone.  
"Don't worry, Heavy. If the serum actually does not work - which should be absolutely impossible - we will win very quickly and then we are gone. On a map where you'll be back in the front. As is usual, okay?"  
"You are right, Doktor."  
Medic gives him an encouraging smile. "That's right. Always remember that this team needs you. Plus, you're always shown on the cover pages of the monthly mercenary journal. You're a role model for anyone who wants to be a Heavy Weapons Guy."  
Now, Heavy's smile returns. "Doktor is right! Heavy is slow but strong and never gives up! I will follow you. No matter if I catch up with the team timely or not."  
"That's what I call fighting spirit!"

 _"Mission begins in ten seconds!"_  
"Come here, sister!" Soldier grabs Medic from behind and tucks him under his arm. "Übercharge ready?"  
"Of course. I hope this is the last time I have to blow myself up with you."  
"Kraut grows out of the ground and eagles fly through the air."  
"Hmpf!"  
 _"Five!"_  
Despite Medic's words, Heavy's heart starts beating faster.  
 _"Four!"_  
How slow he may be, he will follow the team!  
 _"Three!"_  
It is the last fight.  
 _"Two!"_  
Heavy watches the others. Everyone looks so confident as they stand like saltpans waiting for the kickoff. Snipers Van howls softly, in anticipation of finally starting.  
 _"One!"_  
Here we go!  
With a loud bang Soldier and Demoman catapulted into the air. Medic screams in panic.  
With a devious laugh Scout is sprinting after them. Engineer uses his Sentry and Pyro his Thermal Thruster to follow Soldier and Demoman through the air.  
Sniper follows the team in his van and Spy rides along with him by doing himself comfortable on the back bumper bar.

The Russian sighs.  
 _Let's go, Heavy._  
He picks up his beloved Sasha and starts to run. He is slow, as always. Actually, Medics serum does not work. But Heavy is not angry or disappointed. But on the contrary. He is very grateful that they all took the trouble to help him. Even though he was more or less insulted in the end.  
Luckily, the first checkpoint is not far off and Heavy is amazed when he catch up with his team there. And only then he notices that no fight noises were heard.  
"What's the matter?" Heavy asks as he arrives.  
"No idea, lad. The checkpoint was unguarded when we arrived here" Demoman answers.  
"Pfft! These cowards" Scout laughs, standing on the checkpoint, switching the color of the light from blue to red. "They don't want to show any weakness of a total annihilation a third time and refuse to fight."  
"They cannot do that. They commit a violation of a contract!"  
"I don't care about that. The faster the better."  
Everyone takes it that way and hurries on to the second checkpoint. Heavy does not immediately follow this time. The whole thing seems a bit strange to him. Could that be a trap?  
He looks around in all directions. The enemy does not seem to be around. From behind they will probably not be attacked. The place seems completely deserted. Is it really possible that the BLU team refuses to fight? If it really is, then they do not have the right to call themselves mercenaries. No honor, no pride, just cowards. And yet, Heavy surprises the reaction of their enemies. They have been fighting them for a few years now. And so far nothing like that had happened. However, the BLUs have recently suffered some crushing defeats.

 _"Captured the control point B!"_  
The voice of the administrator tears Heavy out of his thoughts and he starts moving again and follows the path through the short passage and past the second checkpoint. This, too, seemed to have been unguarded.  
Heavy has a bad feeling.

Heavy finally reaches the entrance to the lab, where the third and final checkpoint is located. Nobody from his team can be seen, so they must all be inside. But why does not the administrator announce that control point C has been conquered and wishes them a happy slaughter fest? Is the third checkpoint not guarded, too? And his team is now looking for the BLUs to find out where they are before they start conquering?  
Heavy had not made it to the heart of the large laboratory building so far. He climbs a staircase and looks up there. Lots of rooms with some kind of technical equipment Heavy can do absolutely nothing with. Why are there places like this here anyway?

The Russian is about to call for Medic and the others when loud, vicious laughter keeps him from doing so.  
"Hm?"  
Heavy returns to the main hallway. There is a large panoramic window without glass. He looks from there to the floor below him and is astonished and shocked at the same time as he discovers the third checkpoint - and his team, surrounded by the BLUs.  
Instinctively, Heavy is ducking. Caution, he peeks over the edge to get an accurate picture of the situation. It does not look good.  
BLU Heavy, Demoman, Scout and Spy are standing around them, their weapons pointed at them. Engineer sets up his Sentry on the checkpoint while Sniper points his sniper rifle at them from a few meters distance.  
Even the BLU Medic keeps them at bay with his crossbow.  
Apropos weapons... The entire RED team is unarmed!  
 _How could this happen?_  
Heavy tries to look for the dropped weapons, but he cannot see them anywhere. They probably did not just drop them. Well, maybe the BLUs took the weapons from them.

"Finally we've got ya, ya rats" laughs BLU Demoman. "At first we were worried that ya could see through our trap, but because of your arrogance, ya went straight in and that's just because last two fights ya won in a rout."  
"Pride will 'ave a fall" Spy agrees.  
"You said it, lad!"  
"Were not you suspicious when you could easily conquer the control points?"  
"No offense meant, Harthelm, but even with you we have no trouble conquering" mocks RED Scout and winks at Engineer.  
"Boy, oh boy" Engineer steps toward Scout, aiming his shotgun between his eyes. "Otherwise you'll die first of all."  
"Why don't you just shoot, huh?"  
"Because we want to kill you RED rats in a special way."  
"And how?"  
"We will squash you - with the magnet above you."  
Heavy looks up at the ceiling. There actually hangs a big, circular magnet the size of a checkpoint and on the body hang the weapons of his teammates. So the BLU team took away their weapons. And now they are to be crushed by this magnet? The thing looks like it weighs a ton. A horrible death...

"Pfft! Let the thing fall onto us so we can get it over with."  
"Do you really think we will kill you quickly?" BLU Soldier grins maliciously. "No, very slowly you will be crushed under the magnet and you will live so long to witness how each and every bone break in your body, your ribs penetrate your lungs and your blood clogs your airway."  
"Haha! Yes, you have to know what that feels like, maggot. I remember well that you got caught in the death trap on the Egypt map and was crushed by the ceiling. Slowly."  
BLU Soldier growls threateningly. "Not slow enough. Cannot wait for you to lie before me like feet-crushed maggots."  
Heavy has to swallow hard when he hears that. The BLU team is more angry as he had previously adopted. He cannot let that happen!  
Suddenly he hears BLU Medic saying: "Hey, there's one missing. Where is your Heavy?"  
"The slowpoke couldn't keep up with us. He probably didn't even manage half the distance. You sure know what that's like, isn't it, fatty? "Scout winks at BLU Heavy. The Russian growls threateningly.  
"Should we wait for him?"  
"No. We'll get the commie later. Now I want to hear bones crack. Engie! Reinforce the ground magnet!"  
"Hell yeah!"  
Suddenly the members of the RED team fall to the ground for no apparent reason and stay there.  
At first, Heavy does not understand, but then he realizes it. Why they had not stirred the whole time, not resisted. They could not. And only then does Heavy realize that the ground looks different under them. A magnetic field.  
"And now deactivate the ceiling magnet!"  
As before, the BLU Engineer presses a button on his remote control and suddenly the weapons are released from the magnet above them. BLU Pyro screams, pulls out his flamethrower and with a targeted air pressure, the weapons are thrown over the checkpoint. In addition, they are shredded by Engineer's Level-3-Sentry in pieces, where the separates finally disappear in the dark abyss.  
"And this bring us to the fun part. Engie!"  
"Heck yeah!"  
Now the heavyweight ceiling magnet begins to lower.

RED Heavy's heart begins to pump. He feels adrenaline rushing through his veins and shaking his body. He clenches his big hands into fists.  
"Never, never, make me angry!"  
Even as the BLU team turns around for the voice, Heavy lifts his Sasha over the edge and fires at the opposing Sentry on the placed checkpoint. Together with it, Engineer is also pierced by the hail of bullets and collapses dead while his sentry gun decays into pieces with a loud bang.  
"KILL HIM!" Orders Soldier, and the BLU team fires with everything it has. Heavy is too slow to dodge. He would have had to drop Sasha for that, but he has not the heart to do it.  
A hail of rockets, bombs and bullets charged at him. Instinctively, he holds his arm protectively over his face, his eyes tightly closed.  
He hears it banging, but more does not seem to happen.  
"HEAVY!"  
Medics voice calling him. Only then does the Russian dare to reopen his eyes - and is more than amazed when he realizes that his whole body has plunged into this familiar blood red, as evoked by Medics Übercharge. But Medic is still down there on the ground, unable to move. How is that possible? The reason for that can't be Medic's medicine, can it?  
Heavy is so confused that he does not notice that the BLU team has given up shooting at him and the BLU Soldier grabbed Engineer's remote and presses a button on it.  
Suddenly, Heavy's weapon is pulled up by an invisible force. It's owner opposes with all his might, but the pull gets stronger and stronger. It's the ceiling magnet that attracts his Minigun. With a powerful jerk he flies across the deep abyss over to the large body and sticks there. Below him, his team lying on the ground.

BLU Soldier laughs victoriously.  
Got you, commie! Now you can still be killed together with your team. However you may have gained invulnerability without help, but Übercharge or not- it will not prevent you from being squashed. Maybe you'll live a little longer and watch your comrades die miserably before your turn. Enjoy this moment! I will for sure."  
The Ceiling Magnet continues to descend incessantly on Heavy's team. He does not want to be crushed. Heavy is the one who crushes enemies and things!  
He realizes that he has no trouble holding himself on his weapon. As if the vigors never end. Could it be that Medic's miracle medicine has not only given him invulnerability, but also a surge of power? The closer the magnet comes to the ground, the more the Russian feels the force of the magnetic field beneath him trying to pull him down. It is indeed very strong. Heavy is using this power to try something out. With full body use, Heavy pulls on his minigun as much as possible. He hears the BLU team laugh. Presumably, they think he's trying to get his weapon of off the magnet, but in fact his ultimate goal is to release the entire magnet from its mount.  
His heart is like a steam-hammer in his chest. Not even during Medic's Übercharge, it beats so fast. The fear is great that the high-performance muscle could break out of his body and the adrenaline is its fuel. This feeling is so weird that it turns in Heavy's head. The whole situation feels absolutely surreal.  
But that does not stop him from clinging to his plan and pulling and fighting.  
"You will not get free that weapon this way, commie!"  
"From up there he looks even fatter! Am I right, fat ass?" laughs BLU Scout and pushes his elbow playfully against the ribs of their Heavy. He only makes a hum.

"What is he just up to?" BLU Medic talks to himself while watching RED Heavy closely. Spy heard that.  
"Do you really think 'e 'as a plan, Docteur?"  
"Perhaps... I don't know. Maybe he's just desperate. What surprises me is that his Übercharge persists so long, and that it seemed to be triggered by itself... Which fraudulent method did you use again, you impostor?"  
BLU Medic turns to RED Medic, who can barely lift his head, but gives his opponent a superior smile.  
"Believe it or not, but I really have no idea."  
"You're lying!"  
"Really? Can I then assume that you will again try to kidnap me and lure out of me the secret, as you have already tried for the normal Übercharge? Don't worry. If we have a secret, then we share it with you. After all, we don't want to stand there like cowards and cheaters."  
"Are you making fun of me?"  
"Well, no one else has said anything funny yet."  
"Why you-! I cannot wait to see you squashed."  
"Ach? Are you sure that you will endure this sight? I mean because of your phobia against blood and offal."  
"I have overcome this fear long ago!"  
"Don't let yourself be provoked, Medic" conciliates BLU Spy. "'e and all the others will die a very painful death in a few moments. Enjoy this moment."  
Now a smile appears on his face. "You're right. Nothing and nobody can save you now. Also no spontaneously triggered Übercharge."

RED Heavy doesn't overhear the things among themselves. He is determined to release this magnet from its mount before it reaches the ground.  
After another powerful pull, the magnet suddenly jerks. Heavy almost dropped himself.  
"What the hell was that?" shouts one of the BLUs from below.  
Heavy grins. "I have plan for you!" One last pull and the magnet breaks away from the ceiling. With high speed, Heavy crashes into the depths with a ton of weight overhead. The adrenaline gives another full steam and inflates his veins like balloons, so they protrude strongly under his skin.  
He lands surprisingly soft on the ground. The magnetic field hits with all its hardness and tries to press the Russian like his teammates on the ground. But this unbridled strength in him seems to have become even stronger and he can resist the ground magnet, regardless of the magnet on his shoulder.  
The BLU team flinch.  
"What the hell…?!"  
"Blow him away! Pyro, use the airblast! Just do something, maggots!" shouts BLU Soldier.  
Thanks to the strong attraction of the ceiling Magnet, Heavy can use his Sasha as a handle, whirling the magnet around once. The opposing team has no chance. They are pushed by the magnetic body over the checkpoint and fall screaming into the abyss.  
Since BLU Sniper is further away, he stays spared and directs his sniper rifle at Heavy, faded out in panic, that he is actually invulnerable. Heavy uses the magnet as a shield, the sound of a ricochet echoes through the room and immediately afterwards BLU Sniper breaks down silently. His own bullet had struck a hole between his eyes.  
 _"BLU team has been wiped out!"_

As in a trance, Heavy stands there, motionless, still holding the magnet above his head. Did they actually win? No, not quite. First, the control point must be conquered.  
He looks down at his team. These too seem frozen. It is completely silent, except for a faint whimpering. It's Scout, who's right under Heavy's feet.  
That's why his landing was so soft.  
Carefully he descends from him and then the boy starts screaming loudly. It was probably Heavy's weight that prevented him screaming.  
"You adipose gorilla! Why did you have to land on me? Oh God! I think my spine is broken! MEDIC!"  
"Heavy, you have to deactivate the ground magnet!"  
"Da, Doktor!"  
With his last, remaining superpower, which now begins to fade, he puts the magnet down, leans it against a nearby wall. The blood red that had covered his body begins to flicker. A sign that it's getting weaker. And then it's gone.  
He loses no time and goes over to the checkpoint. Heavy could easily capture it now. After the last two (for him) catastrophic battles that would be an absolute satisfaction. He, Heavy Weapons Guy, conquers the last checkpoint. All alone.  
Instead, he picks up the remote control that is in front of the control point and presses the two buttons with the ceiling and floor symbols. Immediately his Minigun disengages from the ceiling magnet and his teammates, except for Scout, straighten up moaning. They are rather wobbly on the legs, but get the coordination of their body quickly back under control.

"That was fantastic, Heavy!" Demoman pats the Russian proudly on the shoulder."  
"You deserve my respect, soldier" Soldier salutes Heavy.  
"What happened? How could you become invulnerable without Medics help?"  
"I think Heavy had Doctor's help." The Russian looks at Medic, who looks a bit lost in thought.  
"But not... because of the serum? It should actually have a different effect. I must have interchanged the formulas. Very fascinating the whole thing..."  
"Heavy had a big beating of heart all the time."  
"And now?"  
"It is normal again."  
"In fact very fascinating. No wonder it had not shown any effect so far. It could only do that after your body was flushed with adrenaline. But it didn't make you faster, but stronger. And on top of that it has caused an Übercharge. And the longer adrenaline rushes through the body, the longer the effect lasts."  
"Doktor is genius."  
"I like to accept the compliment, but my genius does not help if my faithful patients don't help. Heavy, you did a great job. And I think I speak for everyone when I say that you alone should conquer the last checkpoint."  
The team agrees.

"EXCUSE ME? The fat ass has smashed my spine!"  
"Stop whining, Scout! You could lying just as well crushed on the floor. Be grateful that it didn't come to that."  
"Fuck you, Spy! I would much rather be dead. These pains kill me! Medic, help me!"  
Medic groans annoyed. "Scout, have you forgotten that the BLU team destroyed our weapons? Including my Medigun. Now you have to be patient for a while until we're done here. This is a big moment for Heavy. There's got to be time for that."  
"Aww geez…"  
"Go on, Heavy."  
With a smile on his face, Heavy's comrades look at him expectantly. That's his moment.  
He takes a deep breath in and out before standing on the checkpoint.  
While they wait for the blue to turn red, they stand in silence and look at each other.  
Soldier coughs. A moment later, Sniper must cough, too. Demoman clears his throat and Pyro shuffles his feet.  
(awkward moment)  
"…"

And then finally…  
PING! The blue turns red.  
They won.  
 _"Victory!"_  
Heavy closes his eyes as his team cheers him on. So it must feel for Scout when he conquers the checkpoints.  
As if the scout had read his mind, he hears him say:  
"Come off. This feeling is not that cool."  
"I think you just don't appreciate that feeling, Scout. Or you begrudge Heavy his moment."  
"Nice, how all of you solid against me. But I'm the one who lies badly injured on the ground."  
"Heavy could straighten little man's spine."  
"Don't you dare to touch me! I would rather die!"  
"Well, we can throw you down to the others."  
"Oh god, no!"  
"So what do you want?"  
"I want Medic to heal me!"  
"But that will not work until we get back to our base. As long as you have to hang on, if the respawn system shall not to restore you."  
"Yes! Yes, for my sake! Then someone takes me up and then let us go back!"  
"Heavy, would you mind?"  
"No, Doktor."  
Heavy approaches Scout.  
"Be careful!"  
The Russian lifts him up and throws him over his shoulder. There is a loud crack, followed by Scout's cry of pain.  
"I said, be careful! You fat cattle! May I remind you that you did this to me?"  
Heavy is silent for a moment. He hates it when Scout talks to him like that and thinks for a moment to throw him down the pit. But he reflects. It's such a great moment, he does not want to be ruined it. Instead, he says:  
"I am sorry."  
"W-what!?"  
"Heavy said he's sorry. I did not want to hurt you. It was an accident. I am sorry."  
Now Scout is the one who is silent for a moment. You can tell that the whole thing is a little uncomfortable for him.  
"Yeah, whatever. Just forget it…"  
"Let's go and say goodbye to this map."

In the BLU Respawn

"Which humiliation…"  
"We are absolute losers."  
"Stop it!" Medic barked. "The plan was good. But RED has again applied a nasty trick. That's all. They must have spied us."  
"I hardly believe that. These guys are so overbearing that it hardly comes to their minds. They think they can always win."  
"But that's the point! They don't always win. There were also battles that we could settle for ourselves. So we are not absolute losers. Pull yourself together! Now a new map is available. Let's just do our best! After all, we are mercenaries. Let's prove Mann Co. that we're worth our money!"  
"Demoman is right! Cheer up, men. It's only over when age limits our mobility and Alzheimer's robs us of memories!"  
"Seriously?" Scout moans. "So I have to fight alone? I mean, you're all a hundred years older than me. Alzheimer's will not be long in comin."  
Before one of the other Mercs can respond, the light in the entire BLU base suddenly goes out and the mercenaries are shrouded in deep darkness.  
 _"Mountain Lab is now abrogated! BLU team, go to the base on the new map. And don't fail this time!"_

"…does anyone have a flashlight?"


End file.
